January 14th, UNC-Chapel Hill Visit

Well, yesterday was my final visit to Chapel Hill. All other visits will be done in Rocky Mount until the big day. Our day began at 10:00 with a level 2 ultrasound and by having an ultrasound once a week, I am becoming a pro at this point! So... when I saw something that I had not seen before I immediately asked a question to the technician and got no real response. At this point, I just lay there and watched as the tech continued to look, measure and listen. I wanted so badly to probe her with more questions, but I didn't want to put her in an awkward or unethical place, so I waited patiently. She then began to look at the umbilical cord much more closely than had ever been done before. My instincts told me that something was wrong, so I began to pray! I immediately laid this at God's feet and accepted His peace yet again. The tech left the room and came back about 10-15 mins later with the doctor and a med student. The doctor quickly jumped on the Ultrasound machine and "gave it a look". She confirmed that there had been some changes. We already knew that Laura Katherine's intestines were completely outside of her tummy, but now the ultrasound showed that her bladder had also found its way out. They also think that there is a chance that her uterus may be following the same path, but believe that it is still tucked inside her abdomen at the moment. After giving us a mere second to process this information, she moved on to the umbilical cord and explained that the umbilical cord is made up of 2 veins and 1 artery. At this point, without knowing what has happened, one of the veins providing blood flow to Laura Katherine has shut down. She did reassure us that the other vein and artery are functioning at 100%, and that they will simply watch her very closely in the coming weeks. I wasn't supposed to have my next appointment until 1:00 in the afternoon, but almost immediately they got me in to see the OB who will deliver her. He decided that, because she is still gaining weight (4lbs 7oz), he will try and give her another 3 weeks and will take her on February 4th, 2010; pending there are no other complications. I will be honest, I wanted him to take me out of work, simply because I was concerned that my movement, as well as caring for my son would encourage more organs to leave her abdomen, but he assured me that there is nothing that I could have done to cause this, nor is there anything that I can do to prevent this. Therefore, my last day will be February 2nd, 2010.
You know, I have always asked myself, "Who am I like in the bible?" I look at other God fearing women and I can see who God fashioned them like in scripture, but when it comes to me, I can't see me! I don't remember reading about any woman who struggled with pride, said things that didn't need to be said at times, and failed Him constantly; to the point that my prayer life is more about begging for forgiveness than anything else. Well, last night, on the way home, I asked God again, "Lord, I understand that you have chosen me for this trial, but I surely don't understand why! Who am I? I am not even worthy to be going through something like this! Your face can be seen in every step that we are taking! Lord, I am not like the women in the bible! I am weak and imperfect." And in that instance, God spoke to me and said, "Christy, I fashioned you after Job." That was such a shock to me because, I've spent so much time looking in the wrong places and yet, this made so much sense. If you know anything about Job, God allowed Satan to toss trial upon trial in Job's life so that Job would turn from God....but he never did! This is such an encouragement to me because if Satan feels like I am worth spending so much time on...then I must be doing something right! AND! Like Job, I REFUSE TO BUCKLE! God is present with my daughter, me and my family and what I've learned throughout the years is to trust Him! He has NEVER failed me! I've only failed myself! So again, even in the midst of more trial, I will CHOOSE to Praise the Lord!